Dealing with a Parasite, or 'The unwelcome Player'
This is dedicated to my fellow gamemasters everywhere.
As any gamemaster for a serious length of time can tell
you sometime you get a player who isn't welcome and just
doesn't get the message. Meaning that somehow either the
player is a significant other, a fly by night player or
someone who just doesn't want to be polite and then after
a while just aren't welcome company or someone who either
doesn't really contribute. This player earns the title
of the "Gaming Parasite" which simply means,
that you have someone who has forced themselves into your
gaming group and just processed to feed off the group
or someone in particular and make life miserable.
Whether you invited them or not you have a problem. Now
you could be a complete jerk and say hey get the f*ck
out of here, but that not to tasteful and something most
people don't enjoy. So you ask yourself what can I do.
I don't want to be a complete ass about this and I'm stuck
with some moron who I either can't get rid of or someone
who just won't take a hint everyone has dealt with this
on some kind of level and unfortunately it's political
and personal. I mean how to tell someone off with out
making it personal, come let's be realistic. No matter
what someone does someone is going to be hurt and that
personal no matter how delicately one approaches it. But
this problem has many subtle shades to investigate. Not
only is there the problems of a gamemaster with a unwelcome
player but what if you're a established player and some
new yokel who's nothing more than the flavor of the month
comes and promptly blasts what ever previous balance to
atoms and for what ever reason only know everyone like
this person and it often seems they like him/her more
than you. As a player you've got a few options.
One: Wait and see, most groups respond enthusiastically
to the "New Blood" factor. Meaning that a new
person is just prime to tell all of the old stories to.
" You remember the time when Andon killed the chopper
pilot with one punch on accident"......., and they
may have a style that the group hasn't seen before and
they are fascinated by it. Over time this factor loses
its luster and things settle down.
Two: Make your feelings known and hope the group is willing
to compromise. Unfortunately nobody wants to look like
the bad guy or run the risk of humiliation, so this isn't
too popular.
Or lastly Three: Everybody least favorite leave and find
something else to occupy you time. This for obvious reasons
isn't much of a choice at all. But always remember there
are other game out there and there's a crew who will be
happy to have you. As a gamemaster the problem become
much more dangerous in the political sense. When ever
you have more than one person politics become a reality
and as anyone who reads the newspaper or watches the news
can tell you it's a royal pain in the keister. Politics
can place you the gamemaster in a tricky position. Not
only can politics make you look like the bad guy and a
all around a$$hole. They can make for uniting factions
against you when some person or persons want control of
the group as a whole. This is where diplomacy can be used.
We're all supposed to be adults or nearly so. For a change
let us act so. Instead of making a expulsion personal
and taking its reception personally. If it's talked about
in a rational manner perhaps it won't be so volatile and
explosive and people can part on amiable terms.
Now every gamemaster realized the above is a ideal way
to deal with a unpleasant situation But let's face it
it's not an ideal world and people aren't likely to take
things in such a rational matter. All it takes is for
one person to get bent out of shape for a political nightmare
to take place. If you've read the first few ranting you
well acquainted with how badly politics can spiral out
of control and that's one baseball game I'd rather not
see the replays of, so I'd like to try and spare you an
inning like that. But other than a attempt at a controlled
expulsion what can one do.
Well here's a few suggestions. If the player is just
dull and not a pain in the rear make him/her a floater,
someone you call up when you're running short. Like, "Jim"
the younger brother of one of my core players. Jim's a
nice kid, but he's just that a kid. While teaching the
next generation can be viewed as a responsibility it doesn't
require one to make someone a core player in your group.
Let the kid float in and out picking thing up gradually
and when he/she is a bit older give them a full time trial
membership. If it works out great, you've successfully
taught the next generation how to hopefully role-play.
If not neither side is really out anything.
Next is just deal with it and hopefully things will improve.
After all everybody is entitled to a bad season. But failing
all that as I said before is expulsion. Hopefully it can
be done with a modicum of taste and not resort to a slugfest.
But if it does remember NightLife's motto...
Nightlife - 5th January 2000
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